Book Review: Bite Club by Rachel Caine

I knew it had to happen eventually in a series this long, finding a book I didn’t like. But I don’t just dislike Bite Club. I hated it. I actively loathe it, and I had to struggle to finish it. I’m now no longer at risk of reading the rest of the series one book after another. If anything, it will now be a struggle to read the books I’ve already bought. That’s how badly this book screwed the pooch. It’s so bad, my give a fuck meter plunged off the chart. The whole town could burst into flames and kill everyone, and I wouldn’t care. That’s a major league fuck up, y’all.

There’s a lot to hate, but the number one cause of this falling out is Shane’s first person perspective intrusion into the book. This series has ALWAYS been third person singular, and it’s always been Claire’s story. That’s why I liked it, getting the story from this outsider who’s slowly becoming a bad ass and building her legend in this town. So here’s Shane, most of his early intrusions going, “Hey, I’m a walking dick, you know? Let me tell you why it’s okay for me to be a dick. Because…well, because I’m a dick. Man, dicks are so awesome.”

NO. NO! NO! FUCK YOU, SHANE. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO OPEN YOUR DICK MOUTH AND RUIN THIS SERIES FOR ME?

And yes, there is a reason for his behavior revealed later, and yes, I guessed it early on. But having to read his stupid thoughts flat out ruined the book for me.

If that was the only flaw, I might, MIGHT be able to forgive this intrusion and move on. But no, everyone in this book caught a case of stupid, INCLUDING THE WRITER. The writer forgot that the Glass House wouldn’t have let a vampire in uninvited. But fuck that rule because it would make a scene impossible. The story has a gaping logic hole around Frank and cell phones, and in a town running a security grid that monitors every single message and email, I find it really fucking hard to believe that a video streaming site with hundreds of thousands of viewers can’t be traced on its traffic spike alone. “Oh, but it’s really good encryption!” No, man, I don’t fucking believe it.

But this is the story where we see Amalie has straight up gone stupid. When Claire outlines everything that’s been going on, Amalie says, “I knew all of that!” Oh you KNEW? So you’re just letting your greatest enemy build a fucking army for shits and giggles? You just let another character escape, all the while talking about how merciless and cruel you can be? Cause I stopped buying your shit this time, chick.

I really can’t think of a single character that didn’t get stupid. Myrnin, supposed super genius, falls for a damned “rabbit season, duck season” conversation so obvious, I have to wonder why he doesn’t start talking with a Fudd voice.

*Takes deep breath*

I give Bite Club 2 stars. I hated it, and I will now need at least six months to a year before I can try reading the next book.


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