Sunday, June 27, 1998

Vicky opened the door and beamed a wide smile at Bethany and the three people standing behind her. The woman standing directly behind Bethany bore such a strong resemblance that their relation was obvious. Bethany was dressed in tight black jeans and a tighter blue tube top. From Vicky’s lofty perspective, the top offered a great view of the short teen’s cleavage.

Bethany’s mother was wearing the same style of jeans, and her white top was pushed off of her shoulders. She was showing off almost as much of her chest as her daughter.

To a breast fan like Vicky, the twin-twin peaks view was like a kinky all-you-can-eat buffet with a mom and daughter special.

The tall, lanky dark-skinned man standing beside Bethany’s mother had to be the necromancer. The biggest clue was the dead taxidermy-stuffed cat tucked under his arm. His head was shaved, but his cheeks and chin were not. He had a well-trimmed black beard and moustache, and he wore round glasses with thick lenses that magnified his eyes.

He’d chosen to dress appropriately for a visit with vampires with a black dress shirt and black slacks. Even his hiking boots were black. Vicky approved.

Standing off to the left  of the couple was a tall and skinny teen boy with his hands stuffed in the hip pockets of his baggy blue jeans. His brown hair was lighter than Bethany or her mother, and he wore it cut short and swept forward. His tanned skin was closer to a normal bronze tone, and both his eyes were brown, unlike his sister and mother.

He looked a little like a young version of William McCullough, Vicky’s first halfling partner, but the shape of his eyes and his wide chin were the only close matches. His jaw was too round, and his nose was both too wide and too long. The shape of his mouth was also wrong, but there the difference was subtle, so much so that Vicky couldn’t define the change.

Still Vicky found him attractive, and her concession to his good looks caused the boy to smile when he read her thoughts. Vicky returned his smile with a grin.

The boy said, “You got a bit of victim stuck between—” He was raising his hand to point to his own teeth, but he grunted when Bethany lobbed a backhand slap at his stomach.

Giggling at her brother’s fake grimace, Bethany said, “Vicky, this is my brother Blake.”

Offering Blake her hand, Vicky said, “Bethany told me you had powers, but she didn’t mention you being terminally cute.”

Bethany rolled her eyes. “Ugh, don’t encourage him or he’ll have his hand down your pants within the hour.”

“I’m not that bad.” Blake faked an indignant sniff, but his false expression of annoyance faded as he grinned at Vicky. “You are cute for a bodybuilder. Maybe I could try in two or three hours?”

Laughing, Vicky said, “We’ll see.”

Bethany elbowed Blake in the ribs as she stepped to the right and waved toward the adults. “This is my mom, Fiona, and her boyfriend, George.”

Fiona offered her hand with timid slowness. “Bethany hasn’t told us much about you.”

From the way the halfling’s hand shook, Vicky could guess what Bethany had mentioned. “You can relax.” She lightly squeezed Fiona’s hand. “As a matter of coven policy, we don’t feed from halflings unless they ask for it. Even then we just take sips.”

This helped to relax Fiona, and Vicky waved for everyone to come inside. “We’re holding this party in the backyard, since the caterers will be putting out a barbecue buffet. Like I told you yesterday, we’ve invited the neighbors over to make this a real party, but no one has shown up yet.”

She pointed to George’s cat. “Can I put him away somewhere? He might make the humans nervous.”

George handed over the stuffed animal. “Sure, toss him on a couch. It’s just his vessel anyway.” George pointed to his shoulder. “Tom likes to ride up here most of the time.”

Vicky didn’t miss a beat. Making a clicking sound with her tongue, she pointed to the air over George’s shoulder as she said, “Hey, Tom. Thanks for stopping by.”

She turned away and settled the stiff cat over her forearm so that it looked like it was resting in the crook of her elbow.

Looking down, she said, “Try not to shed on the couch, and no hairballs.”

Tittering laughter, Bethany fell into step beside Vicky while her family trailed behind by several feet. “How has work been?”

“I’m out of work already.”

Bethany pouted, and guilt filled her eyes. “You got fired?”

“No, I did my job,” Vicky said. “My partner and I got rid of the wraiths stealing from the center, so I won’t be needed anymore.” Vicky walked into the den and deposited the cat on the divan.

She had the oddest sense that the grey and black striped tabby had started to purr, and she wrinkled her brow as she read an energy signature moving into the stiff body.

She glanced back at George, who said, “Tom likes it here. This room has positive energy.”

Vicky nodded, unfazed by the revelation. She patted the cat’s head and turned back to Bethany as they left the den. “Anyway, my boss offered to keep me on the payroll until she could find me another job, but I turned her down.”

Leading them through the kitchen and into the back yard, Vicky looked for Amber and found her with Emil across the yard. They stood behind a folding table with a set of punch bowls, both of them sipping from glasses of red liquid.

Walking across the yard, she arched an eyebrow as she asked, “Tea?”

“Cold tea, yes,” Emil said. “Made from syrup in the bottles. But it looks just like the fruit punch, which should help keep the guests at ease.”

“Good plan.” Vicky made introductions, excusing herself to go back into the house. She was thinking to fix herself a cup of hot tea, but she was just shutting the door when she heard someone walking across the front yard.

Vicky left the kitchen, and then she caught the man’s scent. It was familiar, and she picked up her pace to open the door for Amber’s friend. As she walked up the hallway, another car arrived, pulling up to the curb instead of turning into the driveway. The car’s stereo thumped a steady bass that almost drowned out the throaty growl of the engine.

She opened the door, smiling first at Mortimer Gorski, who stood in the middle of the front yard. A telephone repairman, he had become one of Amber’s few normal friends after installing an ISDN line in the house.

Heavyset and middle-aged, Mortimer was a bland guy with an overhanging beer gut, someone who looked like a stereotypical repairman. His hair had been cut short, almost a buzz cut, and he was sporting dark stubble. He hadn’t bothered to shave for the party.

He’d also dressed informal with a plain blue t-shirt and a dark pair of jeans. He still wore the same work boots, though. Vicky suspected it was the only footwear he owned.

Smiling, she waved a greeting to him. He returned it, and then pivoted on his heel to check out the other guests. Like Vicky, Mortimer was curious to see who had just arrived to such a loud soundtrack.

The music stopped, and at the same time the direction of the wind shifted, making it hard for Vicky to tell who was in the car, a black Mustang with black windows. The windows were tinted so dark that Vicky could only see outlines of three occupants. The two in the fronts seats appeared to be gathering bags from the back bench. Someone crawled around in the back, but until the door opened she had no clue who to expect.

She was surprised when Ellen McCullough got out of the passenger seat. Her partner Alexander got out from the driver’s side and leaned over to push the seat forward to let someone else out of the cramped back bench.

Vicky’s mouth fell open in a gasp. “Jenny? Is that you?”

The halfling partners looked like they had on their prior visit, with minor differences. Alexander’s auburn hair was longer, and his shaggy mop was starting to match Ellen’s frazzled appearance. Their loose “casual comic nerd” styles complimented each other. Both wore t-shits emblazoned with comic characters, and Ellen wore a long black skirt while Alexander wore black cargo pants. Both had slung bulging backpacks over their shoulders, looking like they were planning for a slumber party.

Alexander’s pale lips were drawn up in a smile, which was different from his last visit. The last time Vicky had seen Ellen’s partner, he had nothing but scowls to offer Vicky. Then again, he’d been mad at Vicky for putting his partner in danger.

But even though his smile was a big change for him, it was Jenny who had undergone the most radical transformation.

Jenny had been pretty before, but now she was exquisite. The oval shape of her face was heightened by her softer cheekbones and narrower nose. The shape of her jaw was also smoother, and her cheeks glowed with a natural blush. Her blonde hair was long and straight, falling in perfect silky waves over her shoulders and back

Vicky had to force herself to close her mouth. She thought she was overreacting, but she glanced at Mortimer and saw his mouth hanging open as he gawked.

Her new face was also paired with a gorgeous body. Her waist flared, exposed by her cut-off shirt. The shirt was also raised by her larger bust. Jenny had always had a near-flat chest, and now she was close to a small C cup. If any human woman had made a similar change, Vicky would have thought they had surgery.

Vicky had always called Jenny a changeling, but now it seemed she had really figured out how to change herself.

Her clothing was wrong for her, baggy men’s jeans and a white T-shirt with the bottom and sleeves cut off. She looked like she was wearing hand-me-downs from Alexander’s closet.

Her bust was also more defined because she had a long black strap that looped over her shoulder and wound around her waist. Both ends were connected to a long black box, but Vicky couldn’t tell what it was.

Jenny  laughed as she crossed the yard. “You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”

Vicky closed her mouth, but she still couldn’t think of what to say. When she finally could speak, all she could ask was, “What’s up with the goofy outfit?”

“I’m wearing Marcus’ clothes because he wants to see Amber.” Jenny faked a pout. “You were supposed to ask what I’m doing with such a large organ on my back,” She turned to reveal that the box was a portable keyboard synthesizer.

She waved to Mortimer when she noticed him staring. “I’m sorry, you are?”

“Mortimer. I’m a friend of Amber’s.” Hesitantly, he offered his hand. “Just call me Morty.”

“Hi, Morty. How far in the loop are you?”

“They’re vampires, and Amber’s a halfling with a vampire’s baby,” Morty said. “You?”

“I’m a shapeshifter. That’s why I look so pretty.”

Mortimer nodded, “Yes, I see.”

“Well, I’m not as pretty as you think. It’s just—” Jenny pointed toward her chest. “I’m carrying a demigod’s blessing as their emissary, and the aura makes me seem more charismatic than I really am.”

By then, Alexander and Ellen had arrived, each one carrying one of Jenny’s bags. Vicky snorted and asked, “Did you bring every outfit from your closet?”

“No, only half,” Jenny said.

“Hi, I’m Alexander.” He offered his hand to Mortimer. “I’m a halfling, but my father was a mage.”

Ellen laughed. “I’m Ellen, Alexander’s partner, also a halfling. My father was a mage too.”

Mortimer nodded. “That’s nice. I’m a human. I work for the phone company.”

Alexander laughed. “We work in a comic book shop. Ellen is a co-owner, so she got me the job in exchange for sex.”

Ellen rolled her eyes and walked up to step around Vicky. “Come on, let’s just head to the backyard.”

Vicky let Ellen pull her away from the door, and Jenny shut it, trailing behind everyone else.

Between them, Mortimer muttered to Alexander, “Is it good sex?”

“No, it’s incest,” Alexander said, snorting when Ellen spun around and slapped his shoulder. “That makes the sex bad, even if I like it.”

“Will you shut up?” Ellen slapped his shoulder again, her face bright pink.

They were halfway through the hall when Ellen stopped and sighed. “I didn’t realize you were holding a block party tonight.”

“Yeah, but no one has arrived—” Vicky heard the neighbors walking toward the house. “Okay, everyone head to the back. I’ll keep playing the greeter until the flood stops.”

***

Seven couples arrived over the next half hour, followed last by the Colby sisters. The sisters were dressed in the same black cocktail dresses, and they each pecked a kiss on Vicky’s cheek before they strolled in perfect synchronization down the hall and outside to search for Lucas.

The connections of their high-heeled shoes on the floor was soundless, and so the three were quite creepy, silent monochrome ghosts with icy blue eyes.

Vicky waited by her post, but after twenty minutes of silence, she went outside to find a quiet party in full swing. Jenny had set up her keyboard on a set of telescoping legs, and she had the complete attention of Lucas, Amber, the Colby sisters, and Bethany.

The other vampires were busy socializing with the neighbors.

Three were older couples, those with empty nests from children in college. Four were new arrivals to the neighborhood, young couples who hadn’t yet had kids. But everyone with families had declined the offer.

Which was ironic, because the party was rather sedate. Jenny was playing one piano ballad after another, causing most everyone in the back yard to nod their heads in time with the music.

Vicky crossed the yard to stand beside Amber, and she was stunned when Amber slapped her arm. The sting was minor, but she still gasped as if she’d been struck harder. “What was that for?”

Bethany giggled. “You forgot to tell her what I said about choosing a different deity.”

“No—” Vicky started to deny it, and then she groaned and hung her head. “That’s right, I did. With the wraiths always showing up, I got distracted.”

Jenny finished her song, and the neighbors broke into polite applause.

Lucas beamed a wide grin at her. “Let me try this out.”

“Can you play?” Jenny asked.

“Yeah, my mother gave me lessons before she abandoned me.”

Jenny nodded and let him take over. She was used to vampire family traditions after living with Vicky for years. Waving to the keyboard, she said, “It’s all yours.”

Lucas began playing with the instruments buttons, sampling sounds to find something he liked.

While he played around, Jenny walked up to hug Vicky. “I’ve missed you so much.” Her laughter was light as she stepped back. “You’ve put on a lot of weight since I last saw you.”

Vicky nodded and said, “So did you.”

“No, I just figured out how to move my fat around. I’d already explained to everyone else that I got training in how to improve my looks. If you think I look good, check this out.”

Before Vicky could say anything, Jenny shifted forms to become Marcus. His hair darkened to a dirty blond, and the long ends melted away, leaving a spiked haircut. His facial features flattened, giving him a wider chin and a flared jaw that he’d never had before. But the more dramatic change was his arms and chest. The sleeveless t-shirt stretched around his thickening shoulders and drew wrinkles across his pecs. His arms swelled, pushing the veins out more prominently, and a tan color flooded his skin.

The bottom of the shirt sank, but there was still enough of a gap to see two of his abdominal muscles pop. The legs of his jean also swelled as his thighs flared. He was turning himself into a little bodybuilder, literally.

A gasp ran through the neighbors as they watched him shift forms. More people turned around at the noise, and Marcus was alerted to the problem when everyone began to mutter with confusion.

Marcus looked around, wincing as recognition dawned on him. “Oh, crap, I thought they were in the loop.”

A panic seemed inevitable, but Marcus looked at Ellen and sent her a plan. Ellen relayed the plan to Lucas, who selected a synthesized piano option and started to play.

His right hand went to the “drum pad” buttons to record and build a short loop. The action was familiar because Ellen was telepathically guiding him through the intro of the song that Marcus had selected.

But once he had the beat set up, she let go of him because he already knew the song. The volume of the keyboard swelled as the magic flooded the speakers, trapping people in the pull of the music. They started swaying, and within seconds, they were humming.

Marcus sang, “Oh-oh—well now!”

Lucas cut in and sang, “Relax! Don’t lose it! Yeah, you want to run for it! Relax, don’t do it! Why you wanna run?”

The Colby sisters sang in time with him. “Relax, don’t do it. Why you wanna run? Why you wanna run?”

Sliding his fingers up and down the keys, Lucas cut ahead in the song, grinning as he improvised a solo on the keyboard.

He settled back into the beat and sang, “We’re sorry ’bout that infraction. Just think on it as a distraction.”

Acting as a back up singer, Marcus crooned, “Oooh yeah!”

“Move those feet,” Lucas sang, hunching over the keyboard. “But not in retreat! Gotta help me!”

Caught in the spell, the crowd sang, “Help me!”

“Help me keep this party going!” He looked around and asked “Are you staying?”

The neighbors sang, “We’re staying!”

“Yeah!” Marcus sang.

Lucas sang, “Erase, just forget it. You drank too much and regret it. Relax, and forget it. Just have a glass of punch. We’ve got some food to munch!”

He was having a hard time not laughing by then, but he finished playing the song to complete the spell.

The neighbors offered a round of applause for him, and he let go of a shaking laugh as he backed away from the keyboard. “That is the weirdest feeling ever.”

Vicky asked, “What just happened?”

Lucas pointed to Ellen across the yard, still holding a plate of fries and a burger. As he pointed at her, she smiled and offered one thumb up in a show of support.

“Marcus used Ellen as a beacon to bounce an idea to me, and then once I started playing, Marcus…”

“I passed him some of my magic,” Marcus said. “Once he got started with the spell, he cast a charm to calm everyone down.”

“Yes, the second part of the spell was aimed more specifically,” Lucas said. “None of us should have amnesia, but everyone else is going to develop a selective memory.”

Vicky noticed how Lucas kept curling and uncurling his fingers. “What’s wrong?”

He flapped his mouth while searching for an answer. “I’ve still got a kind of nervous tension moving through me.”

Marcus said, “No, that’s residual energy from the spell. I wasn’t aware of vampires being able to perform magic, but maybe like Amber, you have enough halfling blood to pull this off.”

Amber laughed, “That’s good to know. If my search for a new deity doesn’t work out, I can always apply my pipes to being a bard.”

Marcus’ eyes widened in a look of shock. “Bard!” He smacked his forehead. “I knew there was a word to describe this, but it slipped my mind!”

Vicky laughed and walked over to hug Marcus. “Bless you, child. You have proved that even with cosmic powers, you’re still a nerd.”

Amber laughed and said, “You didn’t remember a bard from any of your old gaming sessions?”

“Nobody ever played a bard. Not once in the entire time I’ve been gaming. All the guys thought bards were gay.”

Amber said, “Yeah, but you’re—”

“I’m bisexual, and only for my own people. Human guys don’t do anything for me.” Marcus stuck his tongue out at Amber and made a sour face. “You know, you should be nicer to me. Now that I’ve had shapeshifter training, I have a new sexual trick.”

Amber laughed until she snorted. “What can you do?”

“I can make my penis grow.”

Mortimer had been walking up to join in the discussion, and he stopped and dropped his plate at Marcus’ revelation.

Amber glanced around at Mortimer, but she returned her attention to Marcus, her mouth hanging open. “Really.”

Marcus replied with a quick nod, humming, “Mmm-hmm.”

“Well, that’s—“ Amber looked at Vicky, shook her head and then laughed again. “That’s a damned handy skill, Marcus. It’s a shame you aren’t in an open relationship.”

Marcus shrugged. “I’m in an open relationship. Laura doesn’t care if I play around.”

Laughing, Vicky asked, “How can you be so sure?”

“I’m soul-linked to her. She’s listening right now, so if she disapproved, I’d know it.” Grinning, Marcus pointed at Amber. “But now that you two are an item, I would think you’d get mad if—”

“No, she’s free to play,” Vicky said. “If you wear her out, I’ll crawl in bed with Emil.”

“You gotta be kidding me!” Mortimer chuckled, but the sound was half made in disdain. “She looks like she’s about to pop!”

“Oh, good point,” Amber said. Her earnest expression faltered as she turned her head to offer Marcus a wicked smile. “Better keep it short and sweet this time. You poke my kid in the head too many times and he’s liable to bite your dick off.”

Bonus Blog Fiction: Job Interview With a Vampire - Part 7, 4.8 out of 5 based on 4 ratings

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... I write dark fiction in a variety of genres. My blog contains my rants and rambles, and some short fiction that can only be found here. I can be pretty fucking offensive, so viewer discretion is advised.

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This entry was posted on Monday, February 8th, 2010 at 6:23 pm and is filed under Bonus Blog Fiction, Dark Fantasy, Job Interview With a Vampire, Vampires, my writing. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.