Category Archives: Advice from an Asshole

NaNoWriMo, or, What? Me, worry?

By all means, enter NaNoWriMo and try something new and exciting. Experiment and be bold with your use of literary clichés. And if you come to December and find that you want to write another, better story, do that too. If you keep writing more and more, eventually, your stories won’t all suck ass.
And before you ask, yes, everything I wrote before 2006 sucked ass. That’s why I didn’t start self-publishing stuff right away. Because I love you people, and I refuse to torture you with shit fiction wrapped in a shit cover. So please, have a little love for your fellow man, and bury your shit until you’re ready to write a real novel, something around 80,000 words. Continue reading

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Thanks for the advice. Now move on!

Again, it’s great advice, but we’ve all fucking heard it before. Like five thousand fucking times now, SOMETIMES EVEN IN ALL CAPS, because you think we’re moron, I guess. You’re writers, so fucking make something up to entertain me. If you can do that, I’ll turn around and buy your books. So think of it as an investment. Continue reading

Posted in Advice from an Asshole | 4 Comments